Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
