i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
