woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Who died my cat blue again?
Randomize
