I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
