That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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