So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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