this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize