yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
