I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize