About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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