I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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