Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
