is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
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