is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
