Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize