you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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