I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize