If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
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