so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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