your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
