dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Farmville is her only friend.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Slut skills are useful in every country.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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