It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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