and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Mom said you looked used
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
