do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
It's rum buckets o'clock
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
