Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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