I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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