farters have to be the big spoon...
I showed him my bush... on skype.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
