he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
