Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
