last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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