last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
