i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
