Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
