i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
