everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
