butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize