So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
