Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Randomize
