She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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