You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
