So drunk its hurt
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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