If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
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