What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
