Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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