make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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