ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
