As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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