So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
