I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
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