i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
